The stoner's guide to safer sex...

Firstly always wear a BlowDom but if practicing oral sex ensure the recipient partner in your relationship has been adequately fed prior to performing "the act" as an onset of the munchies could affect your future performance. Ouch...

Secondly and importantly please extinguish all items, your partner may not appreciate being used as an ashtray or a hot bomber landing upon their private parts.

Next and this one is very important, never ever use your real name or give out your address or your telephone number to the other person. If they can't find you next day, your fairly safe man...

Also the stoner must not fall asleep during sexual intercourse and for God's sake don't stop halfway to pop down the 24 hour store for papers and a Pot Noodle.

Finally and although your sexual prowess is in no doubt of creating a smell of burning rubber, do not try and smoke your BlowDom in a roll-up or pipe ... it's not big and not clever.

Keep it real, Da Stoner Man.